


K Pass

by Lyun



Category: K (Anime), Psycho-Pass
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Fluff and Crack, Just stay away if you don't want to go crazy from laughing, M/M, Multi, Pure Crack, be safe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-16
Updated: 2015-07-06
Packaged: 2018-04-04 13:05:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4138665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyun/pseuds/Lyun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which the blues are inspectors and the reds are enforcers. Characters from 'K' in the Psycho-Pass context.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Shady

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ruby_dream](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruby_dream/gifts).



> Fushimi is an angsty teenager with a beanie fetish, Munakata loves ninjas, Suoh craves, Yata is clueless as usual, Seri knows everything...including the size of Kusanagi's D. 
> 
> I don't own anything from these two beautiful animes! ^^

 

Fushimi runs—he knows he’s late.

He clicks his tongue in irritation, cursing the crying sky as droplets of water clung to his glasses in attempt to blur his vision.

The dark haired teen felt the icy water splashing against his ankles as he stepped into puddle after puddle.

It was unfortunate indeed, for Fushimi to be dispatched to handle a hostage situation on his first day of work. And obviously, all teenagers _love_ to skip school and participate in some life-threatening everyday situations (eg. Joining shady gangs and hanging out with equally shady people), don’t they?

 

And upon the sight of his new Chief, the senior inspector of Division One, Fushimi confirmed his suspicions of yet another shady person.

“Inspector Fushimi Saruhiko reporting for duty…” The raven raised a lazy hand in a somewhat uncomfortable salute as he greeted his superior with a stiff expression.

“Ah, Fushimi- _kun_ I was expecting you. My apologies, but we are short on manpower tonight—it is unfortunate that I cannot welcome you with a perfect interrogation of your daily life, which I have done so to many other employees, and perhaps this is why their crime coefficient is rather unstable—”

 

_This man is crazy._

“But worry not—today you will not be treated as an amateur,” Munakata Reisi, Chief inspector of the Public Safety Bureau adjusted the slim metal frames on the bridge of his nose with an elegant finger. “In fact, we might be needing some guns to shoot people.”

“Which will be fun, I guarantee.”  

Fushimi’s brows furrowed involuntarily, and he couldn’t control the click of his tongue as his superior shot him a charming smile.

 

_Talk about shady._

“Our target’s name is Ninja 2467381 and it is apparent that he can walk through walls and perform complex _ninjutsu,_ which I am very sure you can handle, but beware for he is one of the greens, and this means greenery—which…which means trees.”

 

_That escalated quickly._

“Very coincidentally, his recorded hue is forest green and this, therefore, suggests that Ninja 2467381 poses as a dangerous threat. We can’t send in any drones because he is green. In addition, we have multiple eye-witness accounts stating that he took someone captive while fleeing.”

“Ha?”

“According to the witness reports, it looked to be a blonde-haired man who resembled a rapper.”

“Ha—what?” Fushimi felt perfectly absurd in his own shoes.

 

But before he could utter another word of protest, there was a shrill sound of wailing sirens piercing the air, and a very, _very_ shady looking van pulled up in front of the shelter.

One would call it cool and flashy—but Fushimi would call it shady.

A platform lowered, revealing a dark compartment.

There was a heavy slam as the platform hit the ground, and Fushimi stared as a couple of shady men exited the equally shady van.

He could hear the clink of their boots against the metal platform as they descended grandly—

 

“Fushimi-kun, please refrain from thinking that the men you are about to meet are humans like us.”

 

_You are very much **not** human, thank you. _

“Their Psycho-Pass crime coefficients have exceeded a specific value, simply put they are people of _no_ character. In normal cases, they would be isolated as latent criminals, however, due to my outstanding benevolence, they are allowed into this world to serve the purpose of seeking out criminals just like themselves.”

A tall man with broad shoulders and a crimson mane stepped into the shelter, his lazy gaze sweeping past Fushimi without a care, and resting on the Chief himself. He lit a cigarette, as if bored.

“They are hunting dogs—beasts used to hunt beasts.”

There was a young girl in a gothic-red dress. Her silver-white hair flowed behind her back, straight. Her face expressionless as she descended the platform in classic Mary Janes.

A blonde in sunglasses followed suit. Why the tall, lanky adult was wearing shades at this time of a rainy day—Fushimi did not know. He nodded lightly at the Chief Inspector, flashing a charming smile comparable to a professional host.

“They’re what we call Enforcers, your subordinates.”

It was a teenager that caught Fushimi’s eye, obviously, because Fushimi has an eye for loud, dorky, short skateboarders who loved to wear beanies.

Who knows? Fushimi could have a beanie fetish and the world wouldn’t pick that up on his cranky face.

He clicked his tongue at the sight of the red head teenager entering the shelter—hence showing his affection.

It was, in simple terms, his mating call.

 

“Oh? So this is the guy you were talking about?” Yata Misaki cracked a smile, turning to Munakata before resting his gaze on Fushimi. “He’s kinda scowlful.”

“Misaki. That’s not a word,” The young girl commented lightly, fiddling with the red ribbon in her hair.

“E-Eh? It’s not? What does Mikoto-san think?” Yata sought help from his respected co-worker, only to be interrupted by the Chief himself.

Munakata Reisi cleared his throat, gaining everyone’s attention.

“Has everyone looked through the target’s data? It is crucial that I emphasize the target’s ability to walk through walls—it is absolutely _amazing_ I must say—”

“Munakata,” A lazy drawl interrupted the Chief Inspector’s partly useless speech, and all eyes snapped towards Suoh Mikoto. “Not now.”

“Later,” He added, as if to sooth the vaguely disappointed bespectacled man.

Munakata couldn’t hide the excitement behind his glasses.

 

“Very well, we’ll divide into two teams—Suoh and Anna-kun, with me. Yata-kun and Kusanagi, please accompany Inspector Fushimi.” 

“Roger.”

“Understood.”

“Nn.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Basic summary of things: Fushimi shot Misaki with a non-lethal paralyzer. Kamamoto Rikio (apparent blonde who looked like a rapper) was saved. Shots were fired. Reports were demanded—of course, by Munakata Reisi.

And of course, Fushimi **_hates_** writing reports.

He wonders why he pulled the trigger on the teenager he obviously had the hots for.

He wonders why he did it on his first day.

He wonders about life.

Well—all teenagers do.

 

Fushimi decides to write the report back in Division One’s headquarters, and as he fills in the particulars, his keyboard crashes.

He curses the inanimate object, turning reluctantly to assess the situation of his fellow colleagues.

Enforcer Anna and Enforcer Kusanagi were the only ones present in the office.

Enforcer Anna was staring at a red jewel placed on her desk, as if willing for it to move—whilst Kusanagi flipped through a German catalogue featuring various types of bars.

“Uh…’scuse me…is there another tablet I could use…?” He mumbled stiffly, not expecting any rewarding answer in return.

In fact, Fushimi secretly hoped that there _wouldn’t_ be any spare tablets, and this would be his excuse to the Chief for not completing his report.

“Well—think Yata- _chan_ ’s got them all at the moment,” Kusanagi replied without looking up from his catalogue.

Fushimi clicked his tongue.

“Which means there’s none. Great,” He rose from his seat, packing his bag. “Guess I’ll take my leave—”

“Why don’t you check on Misaki before you go?” Anna prompted curiously, staring at Fushimi through a ruby-red marble.

There was a slight grimace on the teenager’s face.

“Tch…”

Enforcer Anna stared.

“Ah _fine_ ,” Fushimi growled, giving in reluctantly. “Where do I go?”

“You can see Seri.”

“Seri?” The teenager raised an eyebrow, lost.

“Ah, Seri- _chan_? She’ll be at the control room. She would probably know how Yata’s doing. She knows practically everything; Even the size of my d—”

“Izumo,” Anna warned, turning a sharp eye.

“Dog,” Enforcer Kusanagi finished, laughed sheepishly. “Ahahan…is it bad she knows that?”

Anna frowned.

“Yes.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

“I’m…very, _very_ sorry,” Says Fushimi as soon as he sees the red head open his eyes. The raven knows that his personality includes being bad at apologizing (he isn’t wrong) and so he puts on his _nicest_ front, which simply included not clicking his tongue and not looking at the person he was speaking to.

Yata Misaki laughed lightly, waving a hand. “You don’t see many Inspectors who’d apologize to an Enforcer. Guess you’re a nice dude.”

 

_Not really,_

Fushimi disagreed silently,

_I just don’t want to get fired._

_And well…_

_Maybe I have the hots for you._

_Just a little._

However, the teenager admitted that it was bizarre for someone to _not_ be angry at what he did, especially the victim himself. Therefore—he figured that Yata was being sarcastic.

“Just say it if you’re angry,” He resorts to clicking his tongue, suddenly uneasy that anyone would hide their dislike towards him.

The bed-ridden frame shifted to rest his back on a cushion. “Angry? I’m not, actually.”

Yata grins, his usual cheeky smile that tended to blind the dark eyes of Fushimi. “It was your decision. I have no right to complain, or be angry.”

The raven frowns, unsure of what to say.

For once, he couldn’t think of a comeback. Indeed, it could be well said that Fushimi could handle _dislike_ and _orders_ and _sneers_ and _condescending remarks_ —but **_smiles_** ;

 

That was something he didn’t know what to make of.

 

And so he clicked his tongue to express his affection;

And of course, Yata had no idea what it meant.

Yet.

* * *

 

 

“Wait, Fushimi you’re on duty again?” Enforcer Kusanagi muses, surprised as he catches a dark-haired teenager trudge through the automated doors of Division One’s office.

Anna watches with a blank expression.

“Tsk,” Was all Fushimi could say. It wouldn’t be long before Kusanagi _and_ Anna think that he _is_ actually verbally impaired.

Of course, the scowl on the teenagers face told him that despite the peaceful day of work, _everything_ could go wrong. In addition to the raven's obvious inability to communicate with extremely normal humans like his handsome self; the unko (anko)-loving Seri; the quiet and harmless Anna; and the not-so-human Lion that resided in his den with another not-so-human Munakata Reisi, Kusanagi believed that Fushimi was _very_ suited to be an Inspector.

Well, because being an Inspector obviously involved angsty heartless shipping—he meant shooting—and...and...well, just angsty heartless shooting in general.

Before Fushimi could click his tongue and express his affection for the absent Yata Misaki (cute beanie teen which he had the hots for, including the beanie, it was his fetish), the emergency alarm sounded throughout the headquarters, signalling the immediate required attention of Division one in area **HOMORA 696969**.

"What? Already?" Kusanagi sighed, feeling a headache coming on. "Who's on duty today?"

Fushimi scowled. "Didn't you just say that it was me—"

Out of the blue (or red rather, since it was a red head), Suoh Mikoto entered the office with the swish of the automatic doors, indicating his arrival.

Enforcer Kusanagi makes a peculiar sound, acknowledging his presence. "O, Mikoto, you're here."

"Nn."

"You gonna go?"

"Nn?"

"With the new guy. Fushi-sushi-mi."

"Nn..."

"He's on duty today."

"Nn..."

"Mm, good luck then," He shrugged, cracking a smile (he's just making a guess at what the red-head is saying, honestly, it's obvious. No one can understand what he's saying. Sometimes Suoh himself doesn't). "Don't get shot by sushimi!"

The teenager scowled once again, making the older Enforcer wonder how many types of scowls the kid _actually_ has. 

He wonders about Fushimi's scowls.

He wonders how Suoh can get ripped so easily.

He wonders about Yata's pair of headphones that seemed to be stuck to his neck.

He wonders how Munakata's glasses flash whenever he was talking about Ninjas.

 

 

He wonders about life.

He wonders about the size of Awashima's bust.

 

Nah, he doesn't have to.

He knows it already.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Suoh Mikoto was hungry. That was all that he knew.

In fact, that was practically the only thing that seemed to occupy his mind. 24/7. Not the elevated Area Stress of HOMORA 696969 at the moment; not the clicking tongue(s) (sometimes Fushimi clicks his tongues a thousand of times, resulting in everyone’s assumption that perhaps he has more than one tongue) of his new superior; not the fact that his cigarette box was empty—okay, yes he did care about _that_ one, it might have been the cause of the problem all along but forget it.

The enforcer had so many problems he didn’t care for—he simply deemed that he had none. The antennas (feelers) attached to his messy mane of crimson hair made him a combination of a lion and an insect. ~~The insect being in slight resemblance to a cockroach.~~

Fortunately for the unbelievably-hot-man-who-apparently-had-the-qualities-every-hot-man-would-have, his appearance that attracted much attention was masked by an adorable holo-droid suit that he donned during his undercover operation. Unfortunately, _adorable_ wouldn't be the word one would use to describe Suoh Mikoto.  

"So? Have you spotted him yet?" Fushimi asked in a grumble, getting slightly miffed by the "adorable" appearance he shared with his subordinate. 

Cute wasn't his thing—but that didn't mean that Fushimi didn't like it. 

After all, cute was a word to describe a certain red-head beanie dude. 

 

Suoh let out a grunt, signalling the Inspector to follow him. "There." 

"Where?"

"Nn." 

" _What?_ " 

"Nn."

"Ha?"

The Enforcer sighed. "On right, behind the front column."

Inspector Fushimi's eyes widened for a brief moment before registering the distressed shadow not too far away. He frowned. "How can you be so sure? You haven't even used a scanner."  

"A man can sniff out another man," Suoh smirked. 

 

_Wasn't it_

_"A beast can sniff out another beast" ?_

Fushimi deadpanned. 

_Nevermind._

 

 

The pair approached the figure carefully, ensuring that he would not be alarmed by the confrontation. Well—not that anyone would be alarmed by two adults in kiddy suits. Imagine two teletubbies approaching you. Mm...not scary at all.

At the final moment, Fushimi began to notice that the figure was not another 'man' at all. It was a girl.

Indignant to correct his subordinate, Fushimi could not help but point out the gender mistake that Enforcer Suoh made.

The red head seemed perfectly amused by the statement. He raised a brow, as if to say: _Ya think I care?_

 

  _Of course he doesn't, **right**._

 

"Nn," Enforcer Suoh nudged the girl hiding behind the pillar, indicating his interest. 

When the female made no move to acknowledge his acknowledgement, however, the man simply continued to gain her attention by nudging her.

"Nn." 

"Nn...nn...nnnnnnn—"

"Oh for the sake of Awashima's bust can you stop 'nn'ing!" Inspector Fushimi decided that he had enough of this shit. 

Suoh laughed lowly. "Nn—no." 

 

Before Fushimi could burst into flaming rage, Suoh Mikoto turned to the girl and pressed the automatic button that voiced the usual request to measure one's Psycho-Pass.

"Ayye homo of homora, lemme measure ur Psy-pass ye?"

The Enforcer didn't seem to care what the voice was saying. He simply wanted to get the job over and done with.

Unfortunately for the red head, the girl seemed to be a tough nut to crack. In fact, she was practically _nuts_.   

**"Ore wa DAINANA O KENSHA, MUSHIKI NO OU—prepare to face the seven colors of the rainbow, the kings of the world, the seven kings of power, the seven seas of the seas, the seven gays of the gay, the generation of miracles!"**

 

Simply put: Kukuri likes rainbows. 

 

* * *

 

It was nearing dinner time back at the headquarters and Suoh Mikoto had just finished his shift, dealing with the Colorless King.

He ordered a plateful of meat (Nn *points*...Nn *nods*) and was about to sit at a random table when he spotted a dark-haired Inspector. Smirking to himself, he sauntered over.   

The red head set his dinner tray across the Inspector's, giving a taunting leer as if to provoke him.

"Suoh Mikoto, what—may I ask—are you trying to do?" Inspector Munakata Reisi adjusts the slim metal frames on the bridge of his nose, giving the Enforcer a brief glance of suspicion before going back to his rice set. Suoh smirks, knowing that he had achieved his goal of disrupting his superior's usually calm and distant composure. He digs into his rare rib-eye steak, amber eyes refusing to leave Munakata's face.

He soon yields a successful reaction from the latter, who shot him a disapproving look of annoyance. "Keep your eyes to yourself, Enforcer."

Suoh snorts, feeding himself as he blatantly defied his superior's words by continuing to watch him eat. The Inspector knew (perfectly well) the intentions of the red head. And although he had always been an expert at keeping his calm demeanor from slipping, he soon realized after working with this particular Enforcer, that it wasn't the case with him.

How Suoh manages to do so, Munakata does not know. What he _did_ know, however, was that the Enforcer's gaze was making him _very_ uncomfortable; in the sense that it seemed to unravel him—wait.

_Unravel? What was he thinking?_

 

The red head noticed the look of perplexed confusion evident on his tablemate's face, and he raised a brow—amused. "Something wrong? Munakata."

The Inspector despised the smirk on the other's face, and he hoped that his miso soup and rice would be enough to block out the constant teasing and leering of his subordinate. Glaring daggers at the man opposite, Munakata pushed up his glasses with an elegant finger.

"Suoh, since your shallow mind has an apparent inability to understand the simplest words, I shall put forth in a straightforward manner; that if your eyes continue to wander anywhere near me, I'm afraid I'll have to ensure that—"

"Hmph," The red head mused shortly with a hint of a smile on his lips.

The raven refused to interact with his infuriating subordinate any longer, and resorted to pointing out his partner's empty plate. "It appears that you have finished your meal. Please bring your tray to the collection area immediately and return to your quarters, **_now_**."

Leaning closer to the Inspector as if to taunt, Suoh Mikoto cast a lazy gaze on the amethyst eyes that only glared. "Seems like I'm craving for... _dessert_."

The predatory smirk on the Enforcer's face hinted the unsaid words, leaving Munakata utterly infuriated, confused, and _obviously_ fuming.

 

Not too far away; Kusanagi Izumo had his head in his hands, trying to figure out whether he should tell them to stay away from each other to avoid the sexual tension; or simply lock them up in a room to get it over and done with.

Simply put:

 

_Just fucking **kiss** already. _

 

 


	2. Shady much, Much shade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Fushimi likes gnomes; Suoh’s hunger is somewhat satisfied; Munakata is a UFO; and Yata likes Sushi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked the first chapter! Here's the next :D Thank you so much for all your support in the first chapter :'D It's the first time I actually wrote on AO3 but to get this sort of response was really heart-warming for a newbie like me ;_; Thank you ruby_dream for all the sharing of Mikorei head-cannons :'D guilty pleasure at it's best. 
> 
> It's kind of short but I hope I don't disappoint. By the way, I'm sorry if you don't watch Tokyo Ghoul XD But Fushimi has the same voice actor as Tsukiyama (Miyano Mamoru!).

Fushimi could not seem to get said shady beanie boy out of his head. It’s just—his _smile_.

_It hurt so good._

The raven found himself wandering the quarters of the Enforcers (well, that’s mainly because he was on duty, really—but of course, he happened to pick up a rather useful skill from Senior Inspector Munakata Reisi—and it was monitoring their subordinates) after dinner, spying—no, _monitoring_ the Enforcers.

Although sure that there wouldn’t be anything interesting he would find, Fushimi could not understand the strange pounding of his heart against its cage, as if threatening to break free. His instincts told him that he was in anticipation of what was to come.

However, his angsty brain disagreed—insisting that it was the mere urge to click his tongue (to express said affection for said beanie cutie). Since his superiors have been complaining about his skillful tongue(s) clicking, the teenager reluctantly resorted to keeping his mouth _and_ tongue(s) shut.

As Fushimi sauntered down the corridor of the Enforcer’s quarters, he heard a small commotion coming from one of the dorms.

He backtracked, confirming that the faint sounds were coming from a specific room before glancing at the name plaque of the owner.

 

_Suoh Mikoto?_

_What’s **he** doing in the ev—_

“Mn!” There was a sharp gasp; audible through the gaps of the front door. Fushimi frowned. That was no Suoh.

 

_This man…all he ever does is say ‘Nn’ and use his hands to do the punching—_

_What else could he **possibly** be capable of? _

Fushimi swore he heard a whimper coming from the inside. His urge to scowl in frustration increased rapidly as he began to think.

And of course, Fushimi hates thinking.

Well, _all_ teenagers do.

Making a quick and instant deduction that Enforcer Suoh could very possibly be holding an innocent person captive, the new Inspector resolved to break down the door.

 

_Wait._

_But what if it’s a mistake?_

_Maybe he’s just picking a fight with Enforcer Kusanagi or something._

Pausing, Fushimi leaned closer to the door separating the Enforcer and himself, in attempt to listen and recognize the voice that was not Suoh’s.

“H-Haa—”

After confirming that he did indeed not know this person, the suspicions and doubts in the raven’s mind heightened.

**Listen, I know what you’re thinking, but Fushimi is an angsty teenager who _also_ happens to be sexually deprived. Look at him.**

**Just _look_ at him. **

**You think he knows what those sounds are?**

**Well, no.**

**Not yet.**

Bracing himself, he shifted his weight and prepared for impact when—

“Wait—here…?” The unidentified species was panting softly, slightly out of breath. “Suoh, we are in the entrance.”

As the unidentified species gradually became identified in Fushimi’s angsty brain, the teenager himself felt a rush of embarrassment, frustration, and obviously, angst.

Not…that he wasn’t angsty 100% of the time.

When the Inspector finally registered the identity of said unknown species, it surprisingly _remained_ as an unidentified species because _obviously_ Munakata Reisi was not human, and neither was he any other animal.

He was simply….

An unidentified species.

 

_Well, if he could float then he’d be_

_Unidentified Flying Object I guess._

 

Why Suoh Mikoto had an interesting taste for unidentified species like his superior; Fushimi did not know and did not _want_ to know. In fact, ** _taste_** wouldn’t exactly be the word he would use to describe the Enforcer’s appetite, for the faint sound of someone being pinned onto the wall was _way_ too obvious for Fushimi to miss.

As the disturbed Inspector ambled away with a scowl on his face, his mind soon began to drift back to the cute beanie dude he had the hots for.

Of course—he doesn’t realize that his feet oh-so-naturally brought him to the best location it deemed for sight-seeing, for Fushimi was too busy resisting the urge to click his tongue and produce his mating call.

The teenager arrived in front of Enforcer Yata Misaki’s dormitory door—only to find that it was slightly ajar. Inevitably, Sushimi was curious. I mean…what kind of angsty teenager would he be if he wasn’t tempted by an open door leading to the bedroom of the cute beanie dude he was interested in?

Who _wouldn’t_ be tempted?

 

Well, Suoh Mikoto of course.

He wouldn’t be interested in an _empty_ bedroom; unless the **owner** was in it.

 

As a result, Fushimi was left to contemplate the essence of his moral values; which happened to include ‘To click or not to click (tongue)’, and ‘Only allow beanie fetish’. Despite his incredible ability at connecting the dots, Inspector Sushimi was lacking in the field of Love.

The thing that turned his stomach upside down?

Yep.

The thing that emptied all the sushi in Sushimi’s stomach?

Yep.

 

Whilst contemplating life, the raven had failed to notice the staggered footsteps further down the corridor—approaching him.

Yata Misaki stumbled, unable to see where he was going at all. Apparently, apart from being a skate-boarding, monkey-obsessed, headphone-loving, beanie-wearing, red-head teenager; the youth was _also_ a…small fry.

 

Which…which meant that he resembled a French fry.

 

 _Anyway_ , the French fry (not entirely French, in fact Yata didn’t know how to speak French, except the word that he learnt from Fushimi ‘ ** _TRES BIEN! KANEKI-KUN!’_** ) was having some trouble with the stacks of cardboard boxes he was in the process of lunging towards his dorm.

However, unfortunately for poor Inspector Fushimi—Enforcer Yata did _not_ crash into said raven. In fact, the moment Yata’s hands touched something oddly cold and icy (which turned out to be Sushimi’s elbow, his elbow is the coldest part of his body because that’s where his funny bone is and his funny bone is _extremely_ freezing), the beanie boy staggered back with a start.

“W-Who’s there—oh…Inspector!” The Enforcer grinned, and Fushimi just could _not_ comprehend **why** the other was smiling.

 

_Does this guy smile for everyone?_

_Why is it that **he** can do it so easily when **I** — _

Unable to hold back the urge to click his tongue, Sushimi released his mating call.

“Tsk…”

“What’s that?”

Yata responded with much difficulty, trying to make his way into his room. “Games!”

Another click of his tongue.

“Are you sure you’re allowed to bring that into the dorms?”

What he **actually** means: _Hey cute beanie dude, play your darn game in **my** room. _

“H-HA?” Yata made a sound of miffed protest, partly because he didn’t particularly like meandering his way around the corridor with a stack of boxes in his arms talking to the most socially awkward (apart from Munakata Reisi of course) guy in Division One. “Aren’t you just picking a fight with me, Inspector? Besides! Mikoto-san gave me the okay—”

“ _That_ Suoh Mikoto? What did he say huh? ‘Nn’ like he always does? Don’t lie to yourself Mi~sa~ki~”

In all honesty, Inspector Fushimi had no idea _how_ or _why_ he practically sang those three syllables in the most creepy stalker-like horror-movie tune. But he loved the way the name seemed to roll of his tongue in the most cliché and love-dovey manner which he just refused to show.

The sensation on his tongue quenched the temptation to click it.

Its gratifying softness, satisfying taste and sad sweetness resembled—

 

_Unicorns and rainbows being crushed under his feet._

 

The poor French fry started with a furious blush.

“W-What?? Did you just—why would you—” An agitated growl rose from the back of his throat, and if not for his precious games in his arms, he was sure that Fushimi Saruhiko wouldn’t be having that mocking (borderline sadistic) smile on his face.

“You don’t like me calling your name? Mi~sa~ki~”

Yata Misaki’s ears colored in embarrassment or anger, Fushimi did not know.

“Get out of the way Sushi!” Yata groaned, side-stepping the raven in front and balancing the boxes on top one another.

It was the Inspector’s turn to start with a frown.

He blinked. “ _Sushi?_ Aren’t you going to call me Saru or something?”

“I like monkeys and I hate Sushi so there you go,” Yata made a face with much difficulty, kicking his door open.

“Tsk, who the hell likes monkeys?” Fushimi grimaced at the thought of the butt-scratching, glasses-stealing little animals that made him sneeze.

“Argh whatever, Inspector Sushi. Anyway, what were you doing standing in the middle of the corridor? It’s weird y’know,” Enforcer Yata set down the cardboard boxes in the middle of his room, and began unpacking the tons of games he got from God knows where.

 

Fushimi paused.

 

“Oi. Sushi. Are you dying?”

“Tsk, shut up.”

“Why were you standing in front of my door?” Yata laid out casually, obviously non-suspecting that the very Inspector he was looking at had the hots for a French fry like him. He continued rummaging through the boxes.

“I was…I was checking for something,” The raven’s eyes searched the entrance of the room quickly, darting around to pick up for anything he could use.

“HA? What—are you spying on me? You think I’ll bring like a gun in here or something?” Yata raised his voice in an indignant manner. “And? Did you find anything, Mr _. Inspector_?”

“Who knows? An Enforcer with such a high crime coefficient like you could do anything, Mi~sa~ki~” Fushimi had a lazy smile on his face, wanting to yield as much as a good reaction out of his _Amore(!)._

“You—” The red-head clenched his fists, ignoring the nagging voice that picking a fight with an Inspector would do him no good. “Prove it!”

 

Fushimi had a lazy smirk on his face. “There,” He muttered under his breath, pointing to the entrance.

“The problem lies with…

That gnome!”

 

At that point of time, Yata was _very_ sure that he had no idea what the raven was saying (partly due to the fact that the guy seemed to love muttering under his breath), but when his gaze followed the direction of Fushimi’s index; he frowned.

“ _That_ gnome?” 

“Yes, I was looking at it.”

“Er, you know, Inspector…you’re starting to resemble Munakata—”

“Tsk, what?”

Yata blinked. “Er, never mind…?”

 

“That gnome. I was looking at it—”

“You said that already.”

“I was getting to my point you moron,” Sushimi clicked his tongue to express his affection for interruption, and continued on his speech. “As I was saying, that gnome…I was looking at it—”

“Don’t lie Sushi!” Yata accused shortly, “You were staring at my door! I saw it!”

“Ha? Tsk, why would I stare at your door?” The teenager wavers inwardly, but does not show it. “I was obviously looking at the gnome.”

“HAAA? But you _can’t_ be looking at the gnome!”

“Oh _yes_ I can!”

“No you _can’t_!”

“I can, small fry!”

“You can’t, Sushi!”

“I bet on your cute beanie and sexy skateboard that I _can_!”

“Ha?! Well I _bet_ on your fashion glasses and gravity-defying hair that you can’t!”

“AND WHY IS THAT?”

“BECAUSE IT’S NOT A _GNOME_ YOU IDIOT, IT’S A _PLANT_!”

 

* * *

 

 

Whilst Inspector Munakata was having a hard time trying to silence the sounds that threatened to slip past his parted lips—he was sure that besides his partner’s low, husky panting next to his ear, there were several loud and extremely mood-disturbing voices coming from the adjacent unit.

“Wait—ha—no, stop; there seems to be something…” Munakata pushed gently at the Enforcer’s bare chest in attempt to sit up; but it was obvious that Suoh Mikoto didn’t like being interrupted at all.

Not in his sleep, and definitely not in bed.

 

“Don’t bother.”

“Mm? And why…is that so?” The Inspector replied vaguely, unable to string a proper sentence as he usually would.

A hint of a smirk at the corner of his lips, Suoh forced his partner back onto the bed by lowering himself over the latter.

“It’s their mating call.”

 

* * *

 

 

 

****

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be safe.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you are safe.


End file.
